Fever Pitch

It has been one hell of a weekend.

I had a lot of fun things lined up for this weekend – Easter celebration with my dad’s side of the family, Frugal Friends dinner, a walk in Holliday Park with a friend. None of that happened.

I picked up Buddy after work Thursday and poor pal had an absolutely raging ear infection. He’s not new to the ear infection – he had tubes put in his ears last February for it. This was something altogether different. His ear was draining a sometimes yellow/sometimes reddish substance that would. not. quit. Friday wound up being a PTO day to hang out with Gav and tend to his leaky ear, but the infection made sleep awful tricky and the fever that came with it certainly didn’t help. I couldn’t take him to a family gathering like that, so we stayed home. By midday Saturday, I could tell I was developing a fever of my own! Weekend plans were off.

By today (Sunday) midday, Buddy was much better. I felt guilty that he’d had such a lousy weekend but forgot the magic that is a child’s thinking – he’d gotten to watch TV and lay on the couch with me for days on end and he’d clearly already let go of the misery that was the ear infection/fever combo. He said he’d had a great weekend and wanted to keep snuggling. I’ll let it go too.

Tomorrow I’ll walk into Milhaus 2.0 – our new HQ that has been (at least) a year in the making – for the first time. I am a girl who gets attached to any and everything – the place I spend many many hours a week is no exception. Our firsts are so often easily set apart and noticed – but rarely our lasts. Life moves quick and we can’t always know the last time we’ll pick up our child, hug our parent, sit in Fletcher for your millionth meeting, etc. This time I knew, so I’d been saying quiet goodbyes and reflecting on all the growing I did in that space.

Covid gave me the gift of time with my son that I would not otherwise have had. Once my maternity leave was up, I returned to work 5 days before the Covid shutdown, and I never returned to that building until I turned in my notice and came to collect my things. I had no gradual goodbye. I did, however, have more hours with my son in his early life because I was able to work from home with him there with me. I wouldn’t trade that for anything, but the mental strain of trying to do two full time jobs at once had eaten away at my mental health. With so much time inside, I also lost touch to something that is so much a part of me – dressing myself and going to work. I thought working from home would be ideal – I learned otherwise. It was much more like living at work.

My now boss reached out to me on LinkedIn about a job posting he thought I might be a good fit for based on my prior experience. I had no intent to take the call but I told Taylor about how random it was. She told me I absolutely must take the call, she’d been following Milhaus for years and had even applied to work there herself. From what I could see online, they seemed like a decent company but I liked working from home – right?

I took the job, and I honestly have a hard time wrapping my mind around how much I’ve grown because of it. It forced me out of the house again, to find suitable childcare for Gavin on the days he wasn’t with a grandparent, and to get dressed. I missed that me, and boy was it great to have her back.

The exhaustion of a new job also kicked my ass – my former position had every procedure written out, and there was no roadmap for my current role. At all.

It’s been an absolute joy for me to find my way in the working world again – in a role I was able to carve out for myself. I never set out to do what I’m doing, or imagined my life would look like it does. It’s so much better than I would have been able to comprehend.

Tomorrow is another new chapter – I can’t wait to begin.

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